Heritage Hints From Mama – Getting in Touch With Your Living Ancestors
Getting In Touch With Your Living Ancestors-
Hello from the Deep South, home of magnolias, sweet tea and sweltering hot summers! I am Christy’s Mama and have been invited to share a little wisdom gleamed from my years of experience. Some of it may come in handy and others may just be a little bit of rambling thoughts from my cobwebbed brain. You can take either with a grain of salt. If you have any comments or suggestions along the way, they will be welcomed. Remember, I am getting old so coddle me a bit. Well, here goes!
Today I want to talk about our living ancestors. Do you have a grandparent, older aunt, or uncle living? If so, call today and set up a time for a visit. It doesn’t have to be in person if they live a little far off from you. A phone call will do nicely. I’m sure you will be pleasantly surprised by the outcome and I’m sure your relative will be more than willing to talk with you. They are some of your family’s most precious resources- connect with them!
Is there a favorite food you enjoyed as a child that was prepared by someone in your family? Have you ever wondered about how family traditions started? Or have you ever thought about tracing your family tree? Your older relatives are the easiest way to solve these mysteries and sadly, once these relatives pass on, their knowledge goes with them.
Take a week or so, to think about growing up and some of the memories that come to mind. Make a list of questions you would like answered. You will probably be surprised at the things you think of. Christy hears of so many people that enjoyed a certain food when they were small and long for just one more taste of it. Most of the time it is an everyday food that was prepared from memory and just can’t quite be duplicated. All it would have taken was a few minutes to watch it being prepared and taking a few notes. But when that relative passed on, the  recipe was lost forever. Don’t let this happen to you.
If you have ever thought of taking up genealogy as a hobby, your relatives are your best and easiest by far resource for getting a great start. Ask about grandparents, parents, aunts, uncles, cousins, etc. Take detailed notes and list any names, locations, birth dates, marriages, deaths, etc. Let your relative talk about whatever crosses their mind. You will learn much more than names and dates. You will learn about the where and why that made your family what it was.
If you are able to, take older relatives back to where they lived and went to school, church, etc. It is amazing the stories that they will recall. I have done this with my mother who is 80 years young and even though I had asked questions a thousand times with no answers, it was amazing some of the things she remembered when taken back to the places where she had carried on her day to day life.
Also ask your older relatives if they have any old family pictures. Sometimes a picture is worth a thousand words. By sure and list who the people are in the picture. Believe me, I am speaking from experience. You will probably forget Aunt Sophie’s sister’s name and where they were when the picture was taken. Nowadays, it just takes a quick trip and a little cash to get a picture copied. The old pictures don’t mean a thing if you don’t know who is in them. Old pictures are some of my most prized possessions and I’m sure they will become some of yours too!
To get you started, take a minute and think about what you would have liked to know from relatives who have passed on. Then, you may just realize the importance of taking advantage of the resources you have before they are gone. We are all busy and even though we have good intentions, it seems like we have a hard time getting around to some of the important aspects of our lives. Please make an appointment to take care of a little family business before it is too late. This is just a little advice from me to you.
I’d love to hear some of the wisdom or family history you have uncovered just by taking the time to talk with your living relatives. Please feel free to chat with me in the comments section below. I’ll read them all and look forward to answering!
I’ll be talking with you from time to time but until then, remember Mama loves you and I’ll see you soon!
~Mama
“There are only two lasting bequests we can give our children – one is roots, and the other, wings.”
~Hodding S. Carter
All three of us children were told story’s about our parents past. Very little was written down. We have family photographs going back to the early 1900. a couple maybe very late 1890’s. Only a couple have a name or a date. My fathers mother was from New Orleans, born in the old French quarter. He showed us the house where my Grand mother was raised. What little we could see it was built like a fortress with high walls and a heavy gate but yet still right on the street.. My mother was always going to wright a family history but never got around to it. The women when I growing up always gathered and canned anything that didn’t move. All had some specialty that was brought to family gatherings and high holidays, Christmas and Thanksgiving especially. So much has been lost. I am trying to get the new generations to document as much as they can. My sister is about the last of the bunch to cook like we grew up with.
Ms. Janice you are so right. I have been doing the family genealogy for 42 years, talk to the older generation while they are still living. I did and now many of them are gone.
I remember my Great Grandmother telling me of her growing up years. I was 19 when she passed away and how I wish I had all the stories written down while fresh in my mind. In later years ( my late 40’sw ) I became interested in genealogy and what a treasure those stories would be. I remember bits and pieces but that is all. I asked my Great Aunt about them about 10 years ago and she could not remember all of her moms stories either. So they are lost to the future generations. I just lost my mother in May to Parkinsons and I inherited a treasure of memories of my grandparents and great grandparents. Mom was big into tracing family history.;l I never realized just how much mom had gotten over the years. I even found an envelope containing my grandmothers hair from her first haircut in the early 1900s. I now know just how my dad got his nickname. I had asked dad a few years ago and he told me who nicknamed him but not how they came to call him that name.
One way to learn a lot about a grandparent or great grandparent if they are living is through a Journal Jar. My granddaughter gave me one a few years ago . I am still working on it. My daughter bought a journal book and then printed out all kinds of questions. Eash day or when ever I have a few minutes I pull a question out of the jar , paste it into the journal and answer it . She did this for both sets of grandparents and also her great grandparents. We found moms journal all done a few weeks back in helping dad go through moms things. What a treasure for my granddaughter to have. It tells my moms life story. Now to just find the journal that dad did. Mom put it somewhere and we have not found it yet. Her is a site that gives a lot of questions for a journal jar. http://christmas.organizedhome.com/printable/adult-journal-jar
They make a great Christmas gift.
Family history is wonderfu. I have found out through my research that on moms side I an related to Johnny Chapman ( aka Johnny Appleseed) and on my dads side am related to Princess Di. You never know who you may be related to.
This is a great idea Chris . I am so glad that your mom will be doing this. Will be fun reading.
Karan, thank you so much for the link to the journal jar! I think my mother especially will like this! Daddy…….? not so much! 😉 My parents are 80 and 79 and there are still so many things I don’t know. Things I would love to know. There is no time like the present to ask! Daddy has done a lot of research about his family; but, I don’t know that much about Daddy as a boy. He didn’t like to talk much as I was growing up. Now he talks up a storm; but, still not much about him……..his likes, wants, ideas, his life as a boy, etc. Maybe the questions in the journal jar will get him going!
Christy’s Mama, thank you so much for such a lovely article. I can see where Christy gets her gift of gab and love of people….not to mention her yummy recipes! You both make my days brighter! I look forward to reading more about and by you!
Boy, you are giving me lots of ideas for meaningful Christmas gifts with your comments. A journal jar would also be a great idea. I’ll just have to visit that website and print some off. I need to get started while my grandchildren are still young. Thanks for your comment! Mama
Thank you “Miss Janice” for making me remember how much my grandparents meant to me. I spent every minute with my grandparents that my mom would allow. When we all gathered there for Sunday dinner, I was always in the kitchen with my grandmother while all the other children were outside playing. She would let me do easy things, like beat the eggs for some dish she was making-anything to make me feel like I was a part of the preparation. I learned many things from her. When I spent Saturday nights with them, my grandaddy would stay up after grandmother went to bed, and I of course, had to be up with him. We always watched “Gunsmoke” and then we went to bed .Both of them to be in their mid 90″s and I cherish every memory I have of them. Thanks again.
Your comment helped me to remember doing the same thing. My grandmother, who lived next door, would always let me help. I saw her beating egg whites by hand for a meringue and wanted to give it a try. I found out reall quick that it wasn’t as easy as I thought it would be. Needless to say, I always use an electric mixer for that these days but I always remember giving it a try at Mama Reed’s house. Thanks for your comment! Mama
Ms. Janice that brought back memories of when I was a young girl. Mama would put the egg whites on a big platter, and I would take a fork, tilt the platter and as the whites slide down the platter, I would whip them back up the platter until a frosting was made. Its the only way we had to make a frosting for the many cakes mama made. Back then you made do with what you had.
Your advice is so important. After my mother died, I spent weeks long visits with my father over a three year period and sat with a big notebook and asked him questions about his youth and family members. I was 71 years old and had never heard many of his stories. He died when he was 96 and I am sure he had fun telling me his memories. The stories also straightened me out with some of my family tree questions. Can’t believe how much my family never thought to discuss while I was growing up.
It is amazing how much research time a few minutes with your elders can save you. They can name at least one generation back with locations of birth, deaths, and cemeteries. Don’t discount how important this can be. Joy and I have both benefited from it. Mama
I treasure my family trees from my fathers side & my mother’s side. My great aunts on each side put it together and my generation has added the newer additions to the family. I made copies for my grandchildren that they took to school with their names added on. I am 69 yrs young and I’m still adding newborns! This is why I am putting together a cookbook so my children & grandchildren can read my recipes. I won’t publish it as I have already published one book for them. MEMORIES are a beautiful thing to leave our loved ones…..
By the way, your picture is beautiful and sooo young looking!!!!! 🙂 🙂
Christy made a couple of family recipes for our family’s Christmas gifts before she started Southern Plate. This first one had her daddy and my wedding picture on the cover! Everyone loved the cookbooks. I know that the grandchildren will love them in years to come. Thanks for the “young” comment. It made my day! Mama
Thanks Mama for sharing your heart. I have been interested in both sides of my family for a while now. Two cousins started the family tree on my dad’s side and traced us back past the Civil War. That was really interesting since my dad had grown up in an orphanage after his mama died and his papa couldn’t take care of all the kids. Since he was little and couldn’t work, he got ‘given away’. I had the best mammaw who was really his foster mom. My mom’s side has lots of roots and we sat for hours every summer listening to my granddad tell stories. I started scrapbooking about 4 years ago and have been making one of my parents’ young lives, courtship and marriage. They were married 56 years before we lost my dad 5 years ago. Family is such a sweet gift God gives us. It touchs my heart when I hear of someone who wasn’t blessed with the roots and I wonder how they ever got their wings.
My husband had a similar special “grandma”. We visited a cemetery out in the country to take a picture of my husband’s grandmother’s grave. He called his mom to find out exactly where the grave was after we spent awhile hunting for it. He told the story of how she always made cookies for them when they went to visit. He also told about how nice she was to them. When we found the grave, the dates didn’t match his story! She died several years before my husband was born. The lady he remembered was his grandfather’s second wife. What a great testament to her when the grandkids didn’t know that she was a step grandparent! She must have been a lovely lady! Mama